I was psyched when i found out that my mom offered us to go snorkling. We got to see different corals and varieties of sea creatures. It was worth the suffering of me drinking seawater which is obviously salty. We also went to the beach where the sun is warm and the sand is white and the water is clear (i could blabber about the place the whole day.. fiuhh..) The point is we hunt seashells before we went back to our apartment. I personally fancy playing with the ocean's waves. I love it when the wave breaks which hit and lift my body. The bigger the wave the better :)
It was sad that it was time to go home. How i wish i could stay longer. My family is currently not in good shape. My grandmother was now living in my house, the fact that my grandma from my mom had passed away 2 months ago. Im not trying to be mean or so but somehow i feel uncomfortable with her living in my home. At first i was all okay with the idea but NOW! how i wish she could maybe move? (im such a horrible grandaughter). I feel like i could not tolerate her anymore. (i apologize that i could not elaborate the whole story here). I'm stuck in this home and i could not do my activities freely. In fact, i feel like not living in my own house. What the Heck am i supposed to do! Im supposed to enjoy my vacation, not feeling trapped. Furthermore, im sick with all the drama that happened a few days ago. My heart is about to burst any minute.
How long am i supposed to endure this feeling? ohh! when i arrived home, she went out from her room to drink water and my mom suggested her to take a seat, I DONT KNOW WHY SHE WENT BACK TO HER ROOM SAYING SHE JUST WANT TO DRINK! okay this is crap. why am i angry for something unimportant like this. This is not the first time, almost every lunch when my mom and sisters are sitting together, we called her to join us also but guess what. She just said yes and did not join us until we finished our lunch. Forgive me God for complaining. Please make me stronger and calmer to avoid accumulating more sins day by day. We also did not gather together to have any Christmas eve dinner whatsoever. This is so wrong.Christmas is coming but why is it i still do not have peace and forgiveness in my heart? When will it arrive? When will my heart learn to FORGIVE AND FORGET? Maybe this is the reason why my feelings are not stable. I feel emotional and pissed and not calm this days.
I should probably end this blog soon. Im guessing you readers are bored by just reading the title. Well i hope not :p i would just want to greet all of you a very merry christmas 2011 ! We should all forgive as Christmas is the time to forgive and let us bury the past and hope for a bright future.
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| Credits to tumblr |
